During the past few days I've had to deal with some bad situations. I won't elaborate since they have nothing to do with my training. These situations are sometimes so stressful that you kind of feel like the whole world is ending before your very eyes. Well as it turns out that is probably the only thing positive about having dealt with cancer.
In Oct. 1991 after my 8 days after my first chemo treatment I developed a fever and had to be admitted to the hospital. What happens is that chemo kills your inmune system and becomes very fragile to infection. It requeres agresive treatment with antibiotics in the hospital for a few days. As I arrived I recieved kind of a royal tratment. It was about 9:00pm and I had people waiting for me at the lobby. They new my name and after a few papers I was told where to go and that my room was ready. Wierd!!! This must be a rich & famous hospital or I am dreaming. Not quite, as I arrived to my floor and walked the hall I realized where I was and why the diligence. In burden worda they all know how screwed up you feel and want to get you to your room ASAP. In more medical terms they all know how fragile you are and the concequences of an infection or bacteria that you would net be able to fight. All the patients there had cancer, period. Some better as me and some worse but every single person there had the "monster". It was evident too. You could see people with no hair walking uncovered and most impacting the protesis of thoose who had been amputated because of their tumors. During that stay I met a few people that eventually touched my heart. One was a built up young man about 18 or so and another was a Haitian girl who was about 16 at the time. They both had a comon cancer that attacked young people in their femur bone and many are amputated. I talked quite a bit with that young man as we visited each other and gave support. More from him to me than the other way around. He was a 10 month veteran of treatment. This guy was so positive it was contagious and although I have quite a bit to tell about my frindship with this guy I can't quite maintain composure to write about him. Eventualy he got cured of that cancer and went on a 3 month remision until another form of cancer in his chest was detected. He went thru tratment for that and went to remision about a year later. 4 months after that he was again dignosed with another type of cancer and underwent tratment again. My friends, at that age this young man went thru this same cycle 13 times. Yes, 13 (thirteen) times. His body was all scared from over 50 operations and biopsis. The one thing that always stood out about this guy was that in the years I shared his friendship he never complained. I wish I had done what I am doing today 19 years ago, I think he tough me that and I ignored it. I stayed kind of away thru his last couple of tratments as I grew angrier at the situation and felt I could do nothing to help him. It was part of my process but if I could do it again I would do it a bit diffrent. Rodrigo died shortly after as his body could not tolorate any more treatment. Rodrigo's spirit and experience is in part responsible for the way I live ever since. Rodrigo was 23.
As I said another one of the good friends I made during my stays at the hospital was a young girl. I was introduced to her by one of the nurses at the floor. By the way the 19th floor. I was introduced to her because the nurse wanted to show her what a "cry baby" she was being about getting her IV neddle in her cathater bulb. It may seem like an unsensitive act by the nurse but the reality was that it was very profecional and compasionate. Cry Baby are my words but best discribes it. The reason I was brought as an example was because I never got a cathater. I did not let them put one in. The reason very simple, after tratment is done you need to get another small operation to get it out. I had my mind made out that I would not stay one second longer than what I had to at that place after I was done with tratment. Removing he cathater applied to that rule. So I was always given every medicine thru my veins. After a while you get used to it but sometimes it took 13-15 needles to finally catch a suitable vein. So I was introduced as a guy that stood the pain and that neddles were nothing. The truth of he matter was that this girl was very scared and she sremed and yelled everytime she had to take a needle in her chest. She just could not relax. Both at the hospital and at the clinic I held her hand many times and stood by her while she was being stuck by those needles. She was ding fine. She went in remision and I saw her about 6 months later when we coincided at a fallow up visit. She had hair now and had gained a few pounds. She looked like nothing happend and was indeed a beutiful young lady. She was happy and back in school. In our brief conversation she told me about a dozen plans she had. I was thrilled to see her so well and likewise she was happy to see me too and thank me for my help during those ugly days. We went our separate ways and promised to keep in touch. Kasandra died 2 months later. She had a bacteria which she got aparently during the operation to remove her tumor and replace her femur bone. The bacteria never attaked because of the chemo. Aparently she was dead since the operation and did not know it until she had suffered thru all those neddles and all that time. The Ironman will not bring my friends back and maybe it won't help all those who go thru this same situation all the time. But it will help me honor and remember them. It will help me deal with my experience and apreciate why and what I am doing here alive.
As I went thru very dicult situation I remembered that there is always someone having a harder ime than you.!!!
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