It is indeed a tough time in the training cycle. I am by no means even considering quiting but I a can see why some people would. At this point in training is where you break ar make. The Navy seals call it Hell Week. Actually Hell week is not so much physical as it is determination. At this point your tired as I am, and there is just no way of relaxing or resting properly. I am tired, I am hating the 4:00AM wake up and I am dealing with work and other things that sometimes it feels overwhelming. Contrary to military training at this point you ask your self if you need this abuse and many opt to ring that bell three times. All I am thinking is that I am not making progress, but I am conscious that I am indeed making huge progress. As I took on my chemo treatment back in 1991 I remember that first Friday after 5 consecutive days of chemo. I went out with some friends and partied in South Beach until 4am. By my third chemo I wanted nothing to do with going out, I was drained physically and mentally and only rest made it better, then, I really wanted to quit. The contrast is that in those days It was harder because I knew that it would get worse as the treatment progress. As it turned out I was not mistaken. Today I don't compare it to what I was feeling then because believe me there is no comparison, however it is similar in that I am beat up. I am tired, sore, I can't sleep well, and by the way I am very hungry. The difference is that I see a clear light in the end. I can feel as I get stronger, quicker, better. I can climb stairs quicker today than I could yesterday, I can swim faster, I can bike longer and I can.... well lets just say I can run a litttle bit.
I knew that this would happen at some point and as I wrote I fell victim of emotion. I won't talk about my training today, I will only say that I woke up every day for 13 months, got dressed and went to a hospital to get "poisoned" by chemotherapy. Then, my perspective was that it would get worse as time passed by, today I wake up get dressed and go training. I go see familiar faces and friends, I get stonger, slimer, and better evryday, and guess what......... I do all this with my wife and my 2 kids!! In those days even on the sunny days the sky looked dark and gray, but today I get greeted by a megestic sunrise every morning. Contrast.......Contrast is the color of life!!!!!
I have not had a coke for recreational reasons in 2 weeks!! ( I had one the other day for sugar during training)
I have not had a Soft & Creamy ice cream in 2 weeks!!
I have not eaten rice & beans in 2 weeks!!
I am eating power gels, and drinking recovery drinks and AMINO drinks. Trust me they all taste like crap!!!
I have gone to Chillis twice and have not even smelled a molten!!
and finally I have not had a Flan from Paya i over a month!!!
I am comitted
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